In order to get better, I always work hard at trying to do whatever Dr D suggests. When she told me I should eat whatever I want…well, the idea is kind of scary but exciting too.
Except I can’t figure out what I want.
That probably sounds weird. I’ve never had a problem deciding what to eat whenever I've wanted to binge. I’ll usually get a thought in my head about what I want, usually ice cream or candy like peanut butter cups. But now, since I’m actually giving myself permission to “eat whatever I want,” I’m having trouble eating. Because I don’t want to waste the freedom of eating whatever I want on just eating something for the sake of eating.
But when I was out doing some errands yesterday, I thought and thought about what I really wanted for lunch, and I couldn’t figure it out until I got way too hungry and ended up with a headache. I finally decided I really wanted a chicken burrito from Taco Time, but it would have taken me 15 minutes out of my way to get there. So I got a chicken burrito from Taco Bell, and I was a bit disappointed because it wasn’t exactly what I was thinking of.
I guess the point is, I got too focused on figuring out what I “really” wanted. Maybe the idea is not to “eat whatever I want” as much as it is to “not worry so much about what I eat.” There really is a difference. If I stop focusing so much on every bite I take (the serving size, the calorie count, the fat content, etc, etc), I’ll probably eat less. It might take me a while to get comfortable with the idea so I guess I just need to be patient.
Early this morning B and I took a 35 minute walk…it was already getting pretty warm, so I’m always a bit concerned about pushing him too hard in the heat. I’ll be working doing some chores outside in the yard today, so that will be good exercise.
My tomatoes are coming along wonderfully. Each day a few more are ripe enough to eat. Today there are about 10 ready, so it’s a trickle. Soon it will be a deluge. It’s amazing how sweet the Sweet Millions really are, and the Sun Golds too. I have a hard time bringing them into the house…I want to eat them as I pick them. Sorry, hub, I don’t know what happened…there weren’t any tomatoes today! (lol)
I hope everyone is having a great weekend! Enjoy the summer while it lasts!
I know this isn't the point, but how I miss Taco Time!
ReplyDeleteOur sugar snap peas meet the same fate as your tomatoes - they just don't make it into the house.
You make me laugh when you talk about this kind of stuff because I can relate so well. Now that you have given yourself the permission to eat, you are not really wanting anything... except maybe just what your body needs. I find myself ending up in emotional contradictions like this all the time.
ReplyDeleteThat book... I have forgotten the name, I am going to have to look it up- the concept of intuitive eating. Learning to get back to the natural rhythms of hunger, and nurturing your body with food. In cases similar to yours and mine (with crazy food moms), and many others, we completely lose touch with how to feed ourselves... anyway. Just a thought.
You are so right there is a huge difference between eating what you want and not worrying about what you eat. What a breakthrough for you. Great post. Since I've been waiting for hunger to strike before I eat sometimes hunger comes along at odd times. Inconvient times but I've learned to not put it off more than a couple of time. You know hungry goes away in about 15 minutes and doesn't come back for about 45 minutes. Just a little trivia that you probably already knew. Definitely if you got a headache you waited toooo long.
ReplyDeletethis is totally totally it for me:
ReplyDeleteMaybe the idea is not to “eat whatever I want” as much as it is to “not worry so much about what I eat.”
and Ive found (over years) that the less I worry the more I always gravitate to what my body needs to make it through my tiring day (and yes. somedays thats a Reeces..but youll have that and its all in moderation :))
MizFit
Great post. When I feel I must eat but don't know what I want, I feel a binge coming on.....lol.
ReplyDeleteGreat commnets left by others too.
enjoy life!