I am...THE DOG WHISPERER

I am all powerful. I am in control. I speak and they listen…

In the morning, I command them to be quiet until I want to get out of my bed. The pack is quiet. Today on our walk, I spoke in a soft voice. Dogs listened. When I told them to wait for me, they waited. When I told them I needed to put them back on their leashes, they complied willingly. No cheese required.

When we go outside during the day, they pee on command and return to the house. Whenever we go into the kitchen, they stand politely until the food is placed on the floor. They wait until I say “okay” before eating. When I sit on the couch, they lie at my feet. When I try to watch television, they bring me toys to entice me to play with them.

When I go downstairs, they follow. When I go back upstairs, they follow. When I go into the bedroom, they follow. When I go into the the bathroom, they try to follow. If I close the door, they stand outside until I am finished. If I don’t come out quickly enough to suit them, they scratch on the door and try to stick their heads through the door to make sure I haven’t escaped.

I am being stalked by dogs. Please help.